Texas Calculatem and Poker Office Blog

In response to dD's comment on my redundant trading blog (I might start posting again if I can find anything useful to say), the info on the dax refers to some trades that I did (quantity figures are not real by the way) on dax futures.

I was just experimenting with posting real time trades, but it's hard to do that and trade at the same time. And in retrospect, the info was pretty useless , as there was no explanation of the my trade decisions.

A £500 spreadbetting account is much bigger than my own! I only have £50 in a barclays spread betting account. They give you £100 if you sign up. And I lost £50 on a mistimed FTSE punt.

Anyway, if you'd like to discuss anything to do with trading, feel free to leave a comment here.

I haven't updated my blog links for a while.

The last thing I did was to remove a load of link exchanges, where the recriprocals had stopped reciprocating. So now all I have are links to other blogs and a few affiliates.

Anyway, after his rather grandiose statement, I have decided to rename my Miadad's Blog link to Mighty Penis.

Please help to make this change official by updating your blogrolls accordingly.

Hello,

I'd like to say thanks to Miasdad and Kenny for the kind words they've left on my blog. Miasdad also made an astute observation that if people agreed all the time the world would be very dull. I certainly can't pretend that I didn't eagerly anticipate each new salvo in the battle between Juice and Milk. In this modern age it's the keyboard that's mightier than the sword. Not the pen. How else could two internet fanatics, who are unlikely to ever physically meet, battle it out with such style and panache?

Poker has been the same as always (i.e. virtually non-existant). I missed the Bloggerment as I was eating a roast chicken (picture two posts ago) with my neighbours. But would like to congratulate the winner, Bluescouse, for getting lucky against Amatay's A6o with 22. I'm trying to get back into limit Poker, as I was fairly consistent, before making the brutal move to NL (where I'm a proud breakeven player). However, I haven't found enough time, and it's a lot easier to just sit down where my buddies are. Are friends for the weak?

Regarding my new blog aggregator (click here to see it), I've tidied it up a little, and removed the teasers. Now that the presentation is reasonable, instead of having to check a whole list of blogs for updates, I can just go to a single page that does it for me.

I'm not sure if this is revealing my true geekiness, but I really have wasted a lot of the past month on Facebook. I'd tried myspace beforehand, but didn't know anyone there, and don't think my chav troll image helped draw honies to my page. Anyway, there's an interesting story on the BBC (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/6236628.stm) about how the user bases of myspace and facebook are segregated by social divide. Apparently, myspace is more popular with those who don't go to college, and facebook is more popular with those who do. Facebook's popularity amongst the educated classes could be down to the fact it was founded as a tool for Harvard students (http://workgroups.cwrl.utexas.edu/visual/?q=node/97). However, I don't know why those people would subsequently stay clear of myspace. The only reason that I'm on Facebook is because so many of my friends (who happen to be white university graduates) are on it. Anyway, I'm sure the dude who wrote that annoying Freakonomics book would have something interesting to say about this.

CLICK HERE TO READ A FEW AGGREGATED POKER BLOGS

Hey,

In recent weeks, blogging activity has been hitting new highs with WWIII and WWIV. I've therefore been checking different blogs a lot more than usual.

All this would have been easier if I could check everything in one place, so I aggregated a few of my favourite Poker blogs into a page here using RSS.

Alas, the feed reader hasn't quite done what I want.

Firstly, it shows the full stories, rather than a teaser. This might annoy those bloggers who have adverts showing on their blogs.

Secondly, it leaves out images and videos. Juice is particularly fond of leaving images and videos along with his posts. And some of the spirit of his posts is lost in the purely textual version.

Finally, it doesn't show comments. WWIII and WWIV were fought via comments, and RSS doesn't capture this.

Anyway, if you're still speaking to me, please let me know what you think. Does listing the full story cause issues? And if I've left you out, would you like me to add you.

I'm thinking of writing an email alert/digest system, to periodically inform users, via email, when their favourite blogs have been updated.

Rosie's chicken book has inspired me to try out an organic chicken. If I wasn't such a lazy git, I would have gone to the local butchers (which is closer than the supermaket). However, I am lazy, and needed to get a load of veg to go with it. I therefore went to Waitrose. But the bird has a "Soil Association" label on it so it should be good.

Apparently I'm the scum of the earth. The reasoning is that I posted a link to my favourite lap dancing club on a Tai Chi blog, and commented on how it was helping Eastern Europe.

As a result it looks like I'm being ostracised from the blogging community. dD is even posting his bounty here, while quite clearly stating that he's not talking to me.

The whole thing really kicked off when I attempted to explain the potential benefits of gambling. Being a professional punter on the stock markets, it would be hypocritical of me to criticise gambling. And having comfortably supported both myself and my lads for four years, using astute strategies, there's no reason why I'd want to stop. Besides, academic studies have shown that my income comes predominantly from pension funds, who represent the ignorant masses that frown upon my role as a liquidity provider. And there's no better feeling than taking cash from fools who despise you.

Anyway, I'm condemned to hell, and seeing as there's nothing I can do about it I may as well enjoy life. I went to a house party this evening. One of the dudes there is a sales guy for a pension firm. He's probably the filthiest person that I know and insisted we take a quick trip to a lappy in Shoreditch. I wasn't too impressed, to be honest, as the quality wasn't very high. Apparently, it only has older girls, as the more desirable younger girls go to more prestigeous venues. But it was on my buddy's expense card, so who was I to complain.

On the subject of adult services, I'm about to start up a new escort directory with a guy from work. So far we have one female escort. Worryingly, three dudes have applied to be listed too. I can't really discriminate against them, and will therefore have to list them as well, when they send me their details. Oh well. The layout on the site isn't finished, but when it's all looking rosy I'll post a link on this blog.

Good night!

World War III has ended. It was a war of attrition. Both sides pretty much ran out of things to say. Oh well.

However, WW IV could be taking off on Kenny's Tai Chi blog. Despite being a Tai Chi blog, I was pointed in its direction by Juice a few weeks ago. The topic of Poker occasionally appears there as it's owner, Kenny, is one of the regular Bloggerment participants (is he poker munkey?). Anyway, Kenny's Tai Chi teacher, Joanna, made a criticism of the evils of gambling, and Rottie has therefore decided to enter the fray. Click here to watch the battle commence.

In terms of Poker, I still haven't done much in the last week. I missed the bloggerment on Sunday, and will probably miss the one tomorrow as well. I tried some limit Poker at Pacific but didn't win/lose anything due to my short length of time at the table. I'm not sure what the atmosphere will be like anyway, after WWIII.

Regarding the markets, last week was exceptionally quiet, following the triple witching of the previous week. Eurostoxx volumes were abnormally low. However, there was a big decline at 5.30pm GMT on Friday, as US equities became jittery on subprime loan and oil price fears. Normally I'd clean up on such anomolies. Gamblers, losing self-control and filled with fear, oversell the futures, and intermarket relationships temporarily break down. However, the blip occured so quickly that my computer couldn't keep up, and I therefore entered at non-optimal levels. Oh well. What can you do?

It's 1.00pm. So far today, I've climbed out of bed at 6am. Done the work thing. Sat in the park for an hour reading Lord of the Silver Bow (a great David Gemmel book). Read The Phoenix on the Sword, appreciated all the chicks on facebook, and had some sushi for lunch. However, I'm now very bored.

So... to all you bored Poker bloggers surfing this during your lunch hours, what should I do this afternoon?

World War III is upon us....

Juice has fired the first salvo via this post, and it remains to be seen whether or not Milk decides to take the bait.

I've had some discussions with the Rotster, as to whether or not peace will be allowed to prevail. Only time will tell, but we're both checking their blogs every 5 minutes see what comes next.

Outside the bubble of the Poker world, the news of the days appears to be a meeting between Private Equity managers and MP's. Private Equity firms have been accused of many unsavoury practices, such as asset stripping and sacking people. And only a fool would believe that a large proportion don't exploit tax loopholes to achieve massive tax breaks. However, while I have nothing to do with private equity and know nothing of the ethics involved, the whole spirit of the meeting siginifies, to me, one of the biggest problems with this society. Basically, a few guys are making a lot of cash, and Labour's grateful masses cry foul. Why is financial success viewed as such a vice in this day and age?

It was Juice's birthday dinner today. We went to a nice restaurant in Bayswater. I've already forgottten the name though.

Rosie got him Real Fast Food, by Nigel Slater. And I just got him a bottle of whisky to aid his Poker skills.

A few people from college, who I haven't seen for 5 years, were there. And it was nice to hear what they were all up to. Marriage and home buying seemed to be the central theme.

However, despite the civilised company, Juice decided to show his rock and roll side by describing his favourite strip joint (Platinum Bar and escorts (Angels of London. This was done in the presence of his sister, who was also present. What a brave guy!

As well as the raunchiness, Juice also brought up tales from the dorm, that I'd forgotten about long ago. His favourite tale involved Mr Tortoise getting pepper sprayed by a bouncer working for the Top of the Pops club in Benidorm, and the rest of us getting stamped on, having being incapacitated by the intoxicating beverages that they'd served us. It wasn't one of our more glamorous tales, but I doubt you guys want tall tales about us fighting tooth and nail to defend our loved ones.

I spoke to the local Taleban forces today, in order to get a more complete account of the events described here.

It appears that the local Taleban youth worker was doing some car work for an elderly couple, when an alcohol fueled peasant from the nearby estate walked past in an inebriated state. There had been a previous incident involving parking disagreements, and the peasant decided to unleash a torrent of verbal abuse on the unassuming young Taleban.

Scared for his life, the Taleban dialed 999. Alas, the 999 operator could not forward my good friend to the police, as the switchboard was down. The operator asked my friend to write down the local police station's number instead. All this was happening while the peasant was screaming abuse at him. The operator even asked my friend what all the noise in the background was, as he was having trouble understanding his quivering voice amongst all the background noise. My friend said it was the guy abusing him. The operator then asked my friend to step away from the abusing man...

God! Is this what our taxes pay for? Since immigrating from Asia, the Taleban has made massive contributions to British society, through developing medical equipment, helping the poor with alternative investment strategies, and paying a lot of tax from his various enterprises. Those taxes were then used to fund this comical 999 service, as well as paying for indiginous alcoholics sit in their hovels all day, drinking wife beater and watching Trisha.

It was the Tortoise's birthday bash today and we went to a bar in Old Street. It was a bit too trendy for a geeky uber student such as myself, but what can you do?

Anyway, on the train home, I was browsing through the Tortoise's birthday greetings when this posh bit of totty asked me "Is it your birthday?" She was pretty fit, and I'd probably have quite willingly taken her up the ass without charging my usual fee, but I assumed she only wanted to get talking to the Tortoise and informed her that it was the Tortoise's birthday, not mine (the Tortoise was sitting next to me). Anyway, we got chatting, and she then started slagging off this Gordon Brown book that the Tortoise had received as a birthday gift.

All regular readers of my blog will know that I'm an evil capitalist, looking out for number one, and trying to exploit the weak (and if you're a Poker player who doesn't admit to exploiting the weak you're a hypocrite!). I'm therefore very anti Gordon Brown, and even signed a petition requesting that he not be given the country on a plate. But isn't it a bit rude to start criticising, in a very rude manner, a man's literary tastes on the first meeting?

Anyway, this chick was proudly from Bristol, prefering to be stuck behind a tractor on her commute, than being stuck next to a sweaty businessmen. Though why she sits next to fat men instead of hot young blonde PA's is beyond me. But after hearing a load of Rottie's anger, it's made me think.... Is Bristol ruder than London?

Indigenous mud eaters have launched another unprovoked attack on a member of South London's Taliban community workforce.

While helping an elderly couple with their car, the conscientious worker was accosted by an alcohol fueled peasant. He feared for his life and had was forced to call the police for assistance.

More information will follow at a later date...

In no way am I an ethical person. The only charities I support are for underpriveleged animals. I thrive on chaos. And earn a living by exploiting the fear and stupidity of others.

However, I have been seriously thinking of cutting back my meat consumption, over the last few days.

Rosie gave me a book called Chicken Planet. It describes how unappetisingly mass produced chickens are kept, treated and slaughtered. Ignoring the ethical questions of cramming birds so tightly together that they can't spread their wings, the slaughtering process of dipping them in faecal soup just doesn't sound particularly appetising to me.

I also stumbled across a delicacy called lobster sashimi. Basically, the lobster is cut in half, and while the front half is still alive and writhes around, the diners get to eat its tail meat. That just seems a bit vile to me. Reminiscent of the old execution method of removing a victim's internal organs one at a time, keeping them alive long enough to see their beating heart being removed from their chest cavity. Very disturbing!

The poor little monkey is crying. He's getting booted from home to home and no one wants him to stay.

I've been trying to complement his dirty martial arts training with some monkey style but to no avail:

He keeps on staring at my ass. Dirty runt.

I was first out of the bloggerment. With QQ defeated by KK.

SMT SMT.

Where is the monkey? I can't find him.

It looks like the blog wars are finally over. The battle over nothing is ended and we can return to taking each others' money (or, in my case, making donations to Tan's stripper fund) at the Poker tables.

I was reading the Metro again yesterday. What inspired me was a story about a guy who created an escort classifieds web site before Christmas, that is now valued at over £1 million. I have therefore registered my own domain to stick a classifieds listing site on. I'm not sure whic software to use, but will probably try out Open Realty or Geoclassifieds Lite. Open Realty is looking more hopeful as it's an Open Source project and has a nicer looking demo. However, it's mainly aimed at Real Estate. Oh well. We'll see.

Also, I'm playing around with creating another big affiliate site. The provider gives users a nice datafeed and even a free website. I've installed the website at http://www.financialcharting.com/shop/. However, I think I'm getting a lot of time out problems when calling the WSDL routines from my own php scripts. This is despite using the same WSDL routines as the example site. SMT SMT.

I just won a bag like this one, and a free breakfast with an editor from the FT. I guess my luck is finally starting to turn around.

Poor Juice is getting a lot of flak for his bad beat stories. I don't think he was genuinely trying to humiliate Mark. He just likes to complain. And I'm sure Mark is proud of getting lucky and tilting his fellow blogger.

Anyway, it looks like lots of anger has been entering the world lately. Last week I accidently upset Joanna on Kenny's blog. Saw my mate get attacked by a peasant. Saw an old man verbally abuse a hoody (which was very bizarre, as you'd expect the opposite, and the hoody just looked embarrased to be there). And this week we have Juice's troubles. Where is the love? The Gods certainly don't love Fergie's solo musical career, but here's a classic from her days with the Black Eyed Peas.



I was watching The Daily Politics again this morning. They were interviewing some Labour chick who was trying to avoid saying that she supported a 50% tax. For some reason she equates high city incomes with inequality and is against women spending too much on handbags. What she doesn't realise is that workers in the city are willing to put in the hours and get things done. They don't flinch at working over 48 hours a week, helping to bring investment and business into the country, paying high taxes, and letting Labour give it away in tax credits to buy votes from the masses who think that 35 hours is a long work week.

I went to visit my cheapskate mate last week. We were working on some stuff when the doorbell ran. A local peasant wench, along with her bloated husband, began laying on a load of abuse. And while my buddy tried the calm the situation, the peasants just wouldn't relent. I was rather concerned that the local Taleban branch was about to get shut down permanently, and was preparing to call the police. But just when it looked like the male peasant was about to lamp my buddy, the wench decided to attempt some moral superiority and told her man that it wasn't worth it. What a bloody cliche.

Anyway, my cheapskate mate wasn't too impressed with the situation. As well as paying for the peasants' satellite dishes and beer, via his annual six figure tax bill, and having to put up with the smell of burned out cars every now and then, he now has had to tolerate a barrage of verbal (and almost physical) abuse.

I asked why he didn't try moving to a more civilised area of town. But the only place that he'd like to move to is Chelsea, where the toff totty is abundant. Alas, being a wheeler dealer, he's unable to get a mortgage, and it's therefore going to take him a few more years to save up for that dream pad.

This reminded me of a property market article that I read last week in The Metro (click here to read it). Dr John Bone has warned that British society risks dividing into two tiers. With one lucky sector living off unearned income derived from the earned income of others. I know a lot of people who have been saying this for years, but I guess it takes someone with a Phd to say anything before the media notices.

Just to keep this post on the topic of Poker, it's the 11th Brit Blogger Tourney tonight. click here for details. I should be in attendance and will try to play more tight-aggressively tonight. I've backed down from far too many hands. But having said that, I made a donkey move last night. Making a small re-raise with AA when two people had raised. I should have gone for the all in move to achieve more fold equity. SMT SMT. Tan still appears to be enjoying unlimited amounts of luck, so I'll have to use Poker Office to analyse his moves and put him on tilt.